Halt. Stop. Freeze. Stand still. Stay there.
Terminate. Conclude. Cease. Suspend. Time out. Dissolve.
Cut. Break. End.
It was but a moment ago since I was here and I was whole. But then there was a terrifying roar. The earth bellowed and the sky roared with the fury of demons. At my core I felt a crack, a break, a shift in the universe, a tearing asunder of me, my world, and my understanding of it.
Am I here, in my place? Do I matter?
I’m on fire and raw with feelings so strong that they burn me and sting with just the thought of them. I cannot touch that part of me that is torn and jagged. The part that shattered. That part left me.
That part has to learn how to be apart, and how to become something else.
Me? I spread out my arms and try to make contact with warmth, life and growth, but I can feel only mist and grey skies. If I flail about, will I make sense? Will I make contact, or will I simply look the fool and create empty wind? Am I now in a void?
Let me be still. Let me look inside myself.
I shudder. I breathe. I cast off some of the cloying fear that has sickened me since the deafening crash….Being bound by fear is no way to live.
So I let go of the fear. I relax and let it fall away.
I am still here.
I stand and I am changed, and so…I am new. I am what I was, and now I am something different as well. So it’s as if I am two: a before and an after. Now comes the test, the battle, to see which one will be stronger. Fine by me. I do so love a challenge!
I think, perhaps…I can see the glimmer of an answer – in my form. The lines of me that separate the sky and shade the field of foxtails at my feet are a sign. This journey shall be worth it! Of course it will be.
If you like a challenge, you can join me on my weederful adventure of a changed life. Every day is your invitation.
Please come back tomorrow for a new “Weed Image of the Day” and let me know which ones you like.
We and our weeds are so much more than what we first appear to be.